What I Have Given Up as a Stay at Home Mom

We recently (is almost seven months ago recent?) welcomed our third baby into the family. I also finally resigned from my job of nine years when we moved out to Colorado. As a result, I have been rocking (enduring) this Stay at Home Mom gig for going on nine months. Also as a result, we don’t have as much expendable cash as we used to, I’m slightly less sane than I used to be, and I’ve given up a few things so that we can afford the outrageous rent prices here in Denver. 😉

I might have been able to seek out a job earlier than I have, but well… we don’t know many people in Denver and I just don’t trust anyone that I don’t know to watch my kids. That is one thing that I miss about back home; we had people in Florida. And I miss my village.

But if you’re interested in seeing what has changed while I stay at home just keep scrolling.

1. Babysitters
   This probably goes hand in hand with the whole not trusting people to watch them thing… but babysitters are also super expensive. Luckily, we’re sort of in an age gap where Grey still just sits in his carseat if we go somewhere. Also, the two older kids aren’t too bad to bring places for short periods of time. Sooo sometimes I get to leave my house. But this will end soon, as Grey will become a monster toddler in no time. Going out to dinner just isn’t as fun when it’s also a wrestling match, ya know?
2. Purchasing Things that I Can Rent for Free
   Like books, for example. Or movies. We’ve become frequent fliers at our local library. It’s been a personal goal of mine to have my own library in my house one day. But THAT goal is for a different time… a more financially stable time. These times my budget is more free library book status. I can’t stop reading, because I love it. But I can stop spending.OR Apple has a “Movie of the Week” that you can rent on iTunes for $.99! #yourewelcome
3. Pants
   Well, real pants anyways. I was never really a legging hater in my working-schooling-momming past… but I’ve certainly embraced them on all new levels now. I refuse to put on jeans just to pick my kid up from school, it’s a 20 minute event. And if I didn’t get to the gym that day (where I also wear a stretchy pant variety) it was probably the only time I got to leave the house at all.I know what you’re thinking… my husband’s a lucky man. 😉

   Honestly though, not having any reason to “get ready” was surprisingly one of the most annoying and isolating aspects for me.

   

4. Restaurants 
   This one took some adjusting because cooking really isn’t my favorite pastime. (Have I mentioned how NOT housewifey I am?) And I’m not saying that we never go out to eat, but nothing like we used to. And damn, restaurants are expensive! I had never really paid attention in the past, but even restaurants that aren’t considered expensive are still immensely more than making something yourself.Goodbye, $8 turkey sandwhich at Panera.
5. Going to the Mall
   This might be awfully specific to just me, but I like to shop. I like clothes and makeup and home decor and therefore I avoid the mall like the plague. I don’t enjoy “window shopping.” What kind of sick pleasure do people get out of window shopping?! “Ooooh look at all of the things that you want but you cannot have them!” No, thank you.Lucky for me, I do still get to indulge in one type of shopping…grocery shopping. Which I absolutely hate. Go figure. ;P

   Although, I have learned to enjoy thrift shopping a lot more here in Denver. The city has some pretty wealthy areas and therefore some pretty sweet stuff in the thrift stores. I even find stuff from Target (every moms favorite place to go) still with the tags on them all the time. I’m convinced the Targets here give their unsold inventory to the local Goodwills when they’re out of season.

Staying at home with my children might be the most sacrificial thing that I have ever done. I have said time and time again that I had never wanted to be a Stay at Home Mom. I still don’t particularly love staying home. I get a lot of flack when I say it, but it’s the truth. Honestly, my husband and I would love to switch places. Who knows, maybe we will.

But since I am still in the middle of some kind of quarter life crisis/existential dilemma and I don’t know if I want to go to grad school, law school, or just get a real job… for now I will embrace what I do know; that my kids are little and they won’t be this way for much longer, and I know that I will be greatful for all this time spent with them when I look back.