HOLY 2018 FRIENDS!!! The years just fly right on by. We’re like practically a week in to 2018 already. Can you believe it?! I always say that life goes in fast forward once you have kids and I still stand by it. As the days and weeks fly by I am startled by how fast they grow and how slow I am to “perfect” this mothering thing. I know that a perfect mother isn’t a real thing… but I’m always determined to do it better with each lesson learned. I know I am not alone. So in 2018 (and every year)… I am determined to be a better mom this year.
I can offer you no professional advice (is there such a thing as a “professional mom?? I know some moms who think so. 😉 ) But I do have 3 kids, and I am profoundly imperfect. I have made many mistakes. Probably too many. But to my great credit… I learn from them. I am always trying to be the best that I can be for my children. And that’s really all that any of us can do.
With that, here is my list of ways that I plan to be a better mom this year. I know that I feel better when I feel that I’ve done right by kiddos, when I make a mistake I feel better knowing that I’ve at least done something good to offset it. So here’s to consciously improving on this journey that is motherhood. Let’s do it together.
Let Them Choose – Sometimes, I say no and I don’t exactly have a real reason for it. Sometimes I’m just being lazy or sometimes I don’t know why they’re asking something so silly, so it shouldn’t matter if I say no. But here’s the thing, they wouldn’t ask if it didn’t matter to them. So I’m going to try and say no less. When Zoey asks me if she can wear her Halloween skirt in January, or when Jace asks me if he can “play fight” with the Lego Charazard he shed blood, sweat, and tears over as built it… I’ll let him smash it up against his toy Baymax. Life is made of choices.
Be Intentional – As Jace and Zoey have grown, they have become pretty independent! Gone are the days when they’re so needy that they prevent me from sitting down at the computer and getting anything done (no, now that’s Grey 😉 ) Jace can even make most of his own food. And it can be easy now, to not engage with them in a deliberate and meaningful way daily. I’m trying to make sure that I make time for each of them individually each day. Wish me luck, there’s a lot of them.
Don’t Judge Other Moms – Seriously. I read this blog post from a blogger that I love called You are the Best Mom for Your Kids, and I am the Best for Mine. And I love it (and most of her other posts, too.) Nothing makes your flaws stand out quite like raising tiny humans, and unless you’re trying to help a fellow mother out… keep your trap shut. I was once about a gazillion times more judgmental than I am now. I no longer judge the frazzled mother with screaming children in the store, or the mom whose 2 year old has dirty nails (this used to bother me.) I NOW KNOW that every mom is fighting a battle… and some days the kids are winning.
Tell Them Something Meaningful – I have saved so many pins with positive + meaningful things that you can say to your children each day. (Instead of telling Zoey that “she’s pretty” I tell her that I’m grateful she’s as beautiful on the inside as she is on the outside. etc.)
Time Not Things – This one that I’ve been personally working on with my family. I like to shop. I like things. I’m trying to like them less. I would rather have money to spend on activities and adventures to fill my children’s memory banks than money to fill the toy boxes they rarely reach in to. Honestly, this Christmas they received the least amount of “stuff” and Josh and I were apprehensive at first… but they didn’t even notice. They each got something they really wanted… instead of little things they would lose interest in quickly.
Do Something for Yourself – That’s right… YOU. Moms are notorious for neglecting themselves in favor of meeting everyone else’s needs. NEWSFLASH you can meet them better if you’re not at your whits end 110% of the time. Also something I know I need to work on.
Because at the end of the day… YOU are the ONLY ONE who can give your children a happy mother. And momma I KNOW YOU KNOW how important that is.
There are about a million ways that I could improve as far as this grower + guider of tiny humans… but these are what I’m going to focus on in 2018. I suppose New Years is the optimal time for self evaluation and goal setting. I hope to grow into a better mother (and person) each year of my life. Lord knows there’s always room for improvement. 😉
So here’s to making 2018 the best year yet!!