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The Wedding Ball is Rolling…We met with our PastorManGuy!

Okay… this week has been testing me.  From someone using my debit card for a shopping spree up in Illinois {without so much as bringing me along for some damn sledding} to finishing my taxes,  to frantically preparing for my wedding in 37 days. Yes, 37.

Please allow me to explain my unusual noun-age in reference to the man that will be presiding over our wedding ceremony. Religion is a very abstract concept for me. I was raised a Catholic – therefore the word “Priest” is what usually rushes to my mind first, but since I am not a practicing Catholic these days, we decided to look elsewhere when it came to our ceremony. Ok, well now that you mention it… I don’t practice any type of religion. I certainly wouldn’t call myself an atheist, but religion just doesn’t play as big a part in my day to day life as it does some people. Judge me, or don’t – but chances are your religion tells you not to.

I find keeping an open mind in relation to religion makes me more accepting and respectful to people of ALL different walks of life. That’s just how I see it. Moving on…

As a pastor, that doesn’t already know Josh and I – he requested that he meet with us a few times before the ceremony, to learn a little bit about us and share a little bit about what uniting us in marriage would mean to him. So we met with him and his wife – who have been married for 30 years! Josh immediately stated that the whole situation was “weird.” Sure. I bet if the pastor had invited him over to play some video games he would have been more optimistic. :/ Boys…

But I was kind of excited! It makes me feel a little bit better knowing the guy before the day of the wedding too. Call me crazy. 😉 And I have to give them credit… I think they used the one hour session more productively than I even expected. There was praying… which is cool, I am not opposed to praying. {Should I put that in bold before you condemn me to blogger hell?} THEN they presented us with these adorable little coffee mugs – you guys know I love me some coffee.

pastormugs

Josh’s mug (she apologized for it being so girly 😛 ) Is supposed to signify what he has to give to me – hugs, kisses, and love. Because lets face it – us girls love that… ish.  And MY mug was meant to signify my heart, that I am promising to Josh in return. OK, I know it’s mushy and cheesy, but I thought it was a super cute way to incorporate our little “goodie bags.” BECAUSE yes, they WERE filled with candy.

Now the reverend (is this term interchangeable with Pastor? Someone let me know) and his wife made many good points and had lots of valuable information to share… but these short bits were my favorite:

Murder maybe, Divorce never.”

“Never & Always.”
This particular bit stuck out to me… because I know it’s something that I already do. When couples fight they often say things that start out with “You always do this…” or “You never do that…” And he explained how these words are toxic for healthy communication because nobody “never” or “always” does anything. Which is totally true. And I have since struck these words from my fighting vocabulary.

Then they went on to list many other communicational causes that damage relationships – Josh & I each had to own up to one that we do to each other and promise to work on it.

My choice was listed as “mind-rape.” If you know me… you probably just laughed a little… or a lot. “Hi, my name is Amanda, and I am a type-A mind-raper.” In this particular situation though… my behavior is narrowed down to telling Josh WHY he did x-thing that pissed me off and what he thinks about it. And then there is nothing he can say to change my mind – because I am convinced that I already know what is going on in his mind. Yes & yes. I totally do that. Sorry babe. 😉

Apparently they got through to Josh too because this is what was waiting for me after baby bath time that night.

SO now that you feel like you’ve just sat through an entire session of marriage counseling… I hope you’re all having a lovely day. And that you’re just as excited about my wedding in 37 days as I am (send your RSVPs my way people!) February marks the last full month of my life as a “Foley,” how weird is that?! SO THAT MEANS you’re all going to have to learn my first name {I’m lookin’ at you Publix peeps. 😉 }

 

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